The Universal ‘That Guy’
I’m sure you’re familiar with ‘that guy’; he comes to parties, raves, concerts, festivals…heck even your birthday in a local bar, and is pretty easy to spot from far away. Sometimes you spot his typical ‘party with sluts’ hat from far away, and sometimes you can hear him punctuating every sentence with ‘bro’ from across the room. At any rate, when you spot ‘that guy’, you’ll probably not want to chill with him.
So who is ‘that guy’ and how do you avoid being ‘that guy’?
Put simply, ‘that guy’ can be anyone from the whistle-blowing guy who fist-pumps and tries to hump you at a trap show to the twitter handle insisting you make them kandi (and even specifying colors, style, and words used). ‘That guy’ probably isn’t a veteran raver…and outside of the EDM scene, that guy is probably an ass. Now sometimes there are girls that exemplify ‘that guy’,though from my experience they tend to be more tolerable…as ‘that guy’ on most girls is really just most women that end up on Kirillwashere.com...and I’m a fan of those in small doses. So, how not to come off as ‘that guy’ both in and out of the scene:
In the scene:
- If you see someone losing control (rolling a little too hard, too much to drink) give them a hand and either get them some water or get them to a trash can out of view of other patrons and security. Most times, the person has either had a little too much and can quickly boot and recover after a few minutes of help. If the person can’t stand, can’t communicate, or is completely incoherent, then pass them off to security. A lot of ‘that guy’ types either berate those who’ve lost control or immediately shove them at security without even giving them a chance to recover. Often times this means someone who is only slightly dehydrated gets thrown out before getting a chance to explain their situation. You just ruined someone’s night ‘bro’.
- Ask, don’t shove. If you want a quick pic at the front, ask those around you if you can sneak ahead for a song. Sometimes they will be fine with it, and sometimes they won’t. If you run into a group of bros that refuse to move, see if you can work around a different group. Most people are pretty understanding in the scene, and always see if someone shorter wants to stand in front of you to see (i.e. short chicks like me). They’ll thank you a lot.
- Be aware of what where people are, and be respectful. If you’re a fist-pumping kind of guy, that’s totally fine! Just make sure you keep an eye on where people are around you, and don’t pop anyone in the head (or if you do, apologize). If you want to grind on a girl (even though most aren’t really at a rave to grind), pay attention to what she’s ok with. Dry humping her into submission ain’t gonna work bro.
Out of the scene:
- Don’t be a dick. If you’re trying to get attention whether it be on Twitter, in life, or for anything really…bullhorning isn’t really the way to go: Sure, running a super-obnoxious promoted tweet is good for getting quick interactions….but in the long-term people won’t give a shit. ‘Team FollowBacks” and harassing tactics that are similar off the internet really just end up dissuading people. Rather than blowing whistles in people’s ears and waving flyers in people’s faces, just interact with them genuinely and nicely.
- Move for them, they’ll move for you. If you help someone out with something, sometimes you can get something back in return. Help a drunk girl or boy get their hands on some water, they might just help you get tickets to your next show; help that old lady find a seat on the subway, and maybe she’ll give you some career advice.
At any rate, have fun not being ‘that guy’!